early childhood trauma is a national crisis.
When I began my healing journey, there was virtually nothing written and very little understood. Today, we have lots of information, but the experience of actual survivors and the hope of healing is still rare.
Are we as survivors condemned to live in emotional flashbacks, anxiety, depression and worse forever? Though long-term early childhood trauma alters a person’s way of being in the world, it is possible, despite whatever obstacles we face and the differences in each of our stories, to defy trauma and embrace joy.
My father, a classic self-righteous narcissist, married my mother, a mentally ill, sexually abusive tyrant. Together, they created a monstrous home filled with terror and despair. To outsiders, we were the perfect church-going family. Instead of dealing with their own childhood abuse issues, my parents instituted a system where neither would ever take responsibility for their actions. The only place to vent their rage was at the helpless children living in their home. I was the scapegoat as many truth-tellers are. It would take decades for me to unwind the complicated system of abuse and to understand where the source of my crippling anxiety and depression came from.
Why couldn’t I function like everybody else?
Why was I terrified all the time?
Why couldn’t I ever be happy and at peace about anything?
How many times through my long journey did I think, I wish there was someone out there who understood.
Someone who has walked this path who is not only sharing about abuse but who can point the way toward healing and joy. That is what I am attempting to do.
The abusers have taken enough. It is time to defy trauma & begin the very personal journey toward joy. You are not alone. May each of us find the blessings of life that should have been ours.